The Long Haired Running Man: July 2013

FAVORITE QUOTES / CONVERSATIONS FROM THIS YEAR'S EVENT

Perry: "I wanted him to leave the edges sharp, but he finished them."
Me: "So that every time you picked it up you got cut?"
Perry: "Pretty much."
Me: "That would have been so awesome."
Jason: "Holy crap! Do you think y'all have enough camping gear?"
Me: "Franco and I are going to run the DRT 50K."
Perry: "Baaaaahahahahahahahaha...ha ha ha ha ha ha ha."
Me: "What the hell?"
Perry: "Ha ha ha ha ha ha."
Me: "Seriously?"
Perry: "Ha ha ha ha ha ha."
Me: "Did you come to arrest me again?"
Franco: "Hey...hey, you better not melt my fan."
Dave: "Alicia and I have been married for 24 years, and we just wanted to say congratulations on your new life together. We were so happy when we saw your picture on Facebook."
Tom: "You're a perfect candidate for a chainsaw accident. You've been drinking beer, you don't have on safety Glasses, you're wearing shorts, hell, why don't you borrow John's flip flops.'
Franco: "Aaron, get the chainsaw, come this way."
John: "No, Aaron, put the chainsaw down and come this way."
Franco: "No, Aaron, listen to me."
John: "No, put the chainsaw down."
Franco: "I'm not walking down the trail a mile for John's little stump. Come up here."
Me: "Fuck, will y'all stop fighting? I'm going to follow Franco, his log is closer."
Tom: "Are there more ants in the Powerade? I thought I got them all out."
Franco: "Do you think we should cut up the watermelon?"
Me: "Sure, why not?"
Franco: "I was just asking."
Tom: "What? Look at that!"
Franco: "What the hell kind of watermelon is this?"
Me: "Mother time, this is Black Cobra, do you copy? Over."
Greg: "Black Mamba, Mother time has stepped away for a moment, what's up?"
Me: "It's Black COBRA, damnit!"
Me: "Over."
John: "No, you two are NOT cutting down a 50 foot tree."
Franco: "Why the hell are you putting more leaves on the fire? You're going to burn your tent down. I try to tell him yesterday."
Franco: "Who the hell does John think he is telling us to cut down that tree. I just want to take a whack at at it."
Tom: "Yeah, he has no jurisdiction here. This isn't the City of Atlanta, or Lenox Mall."
Me: "Damn."
Tom: "Is your cellphone charged yet?"
Me: "No, it's at 29%."
Franco: "You need to throw that piece of shit in the fire."
(2 minutes later.)
Franco: "Is it charged yet?"
Me: "No, Frank it's still charging."
Tom: "How charged is it?"
Me: "It's still at 29%."
Franco: "Mine has been on for 3 days and is charged."
Tom: "What are you at now?"
Me: "30%."
(5 minutes later.)
Tom: "You should check on your phone."
Me: "You're probably right."
Tom: "Well, is it charged? What's it at?"
Me: "32%."
(20 minutes later, Franco has fallen asleep in his chair.)
Me: "Hey, look, he's fallen asleep in his chair."
Tom: "Ha, ha, ha."
Franco: "I'm awake."
(10 minutes later, Franco wakes up from nap number 2.)
Franco: "You know, you better check on your phone. That generator could super charge it and blow it up."
Tom: "Yeah, you should check it. What's it at now?"
Me: "Really? Seriously? I am guessing 42%." (I check the phone) "Holy shit! It's at 49%!"
Franco: "I'm going to bed."
(30 minutes later.)
Me: "Hey, you reckon we should move the generator? It's blowing exhaust right into Franco's tent. It would suck if he never woke up from his nap."
Tom: "Yeah, that's probably a good idea, that would be terrible."
(I move the generator across the camp site.)
Tom: "Hey, what's your phone at now?"
Me: "46%."
Tom: "Wait, it went down?"
Me: "Ha, no. It's really at 57%."
(Runner comes in and we tend to her.)
(Franco unzips his tent and rises from the dead.)
Franco: "Y'all are so damn loud, I couldn't sleep."
Me: "Shut up, and go back to sleep!"
Tom: "Hey what's your phone at?"
Me: "You know what? I'm done charging. I don't care any more."
Me: "Do you want me to make you a new PB&J sandwich? There are flies all over that one."
Deborah: "Nope, flies don't bother me."
Franco: "Fish Gap, this is Uncle Si. Do you hear me? I have three questions for Perry. Where is our water and what the kind of water melon is this?"
Jason: "Holy shit that was loud!"
Jason: "You can tell Perry that I am going to punch Kena as well!"
Franco: "Shit! Hey, Aaron, we're turning around here."
(I look down this insanely steep trail leading into Mulkey Gap and then at my watch.)
Me: "Holy fuck! Yep, we're right at an hour. This is the perfect place to turn around."
Kena: "Thank you so much! You have no idea how much we really appreciate you two."